Amazing Things That Will Happen When You Stop Caring What Other People Think

Where would you be if you learned how to stop caring what other people think?

As humans, we have a primal need to fit in. In order to be initiated into the tribe, we try to come across as “normal” people. We often express ourselves conservatively, in order to not come across as weird or awkward.

The truth is everyone is normal (average) until you really get to know them. Owning your actions and making yourself vulnerable in front of others can be incredibly difficult at times but in the end it is healthier for you and for those around you. Here are 11 reasons why you should stop caring what other people think.

1. You use less energy filtering your words and actions, and expend more energy on creating relationships

If interacting with others is like driving a car, then filtering your words and actions is like putting speed bumps all over your highway of interaction. The more speed bumps you have, the slower you have to go to avoid losing control of your car. It becomes incredibly difficult to gain momentum, and takes a long time to reach your final destination (making an emotional connection and mutually benefiting each other). Isn’t that why we interact with people?

The more you filter yourself, the less people will truly get to know you. You might be a Mercedes Benz in your head, but as you constantly filter yourself, you’re going to come across as an old, beat-up Ford Pinto.

2. You become much more attractive

There is something inherently attractive about someone who doesn’t care what other people think. I’m not saying that more people will like you; there is a difference between being likeable and being attractive. Having an indifferent, carefree attitude is refreshing and contagious, and is a great way to help others break out of their “autopilot”.

Think of it this way. If you’re confident and don’t care what others think, people are going to want to be noticed by you, not use you to feel better about themselves.

3. You attract people that are good for you, and eliminate the ones that aren’t

Having a mindset of not caring what others think is a self-weeding garden. The people that appreciate your opinions and enjoy your company will stick with you, while the people that don’t like you will stay away from you.

The feeling of being well-liked is great, but having too many “friends” can be stressful and difficult to manage. You have to ask yourself if you want a wide array of shallow relationships with acquaintances, or a more concentrated group of deep and meaningful friendships.

4. You don’t feel obligated to change yourself for people

You don’t have to wear a ton of hats for all your different social situations. Trying to fit into a variety of groups can be exhausting, and is not a worthwhile endeavor. It is healthier and less stressful to simply be respected for being who you want to be.

5. You please yourself instead of trying to please everyone

Who are you really living for? It’s not selfish to please yourself at times, because after all, you are at the center of your own universe. Doing things for others is a great way to boost your self-esteem, but you have to ask yourself: am I getting what I want out of life?

Pulling Success Out of Setbacks

I thought i should share this with your! Credit to THINK STOCK

To say we’ve had setbacks is an understatement. On just about every one of our major projects, there have been setbacks from the start, continuing on through every phase, including finding the right partner, negotiating the deal, staffing up, delivering, assessing and even winding down. I wouldn't know what smooth sailing feels like.

Setbacks aren’t the same as failures. Failure is when you reach the point where you can’t continue on toward your goal; you’ve ended up on a dead-end track, and there’s no way to get from here to there. Setbacks, in contrast, can be part of your path to success—they may be detours from a straight-line route, but they might lie along a potentially viable route, leaving you with a way forward.

In fact, you could define success as the positive culmination of a series of setbacks. If you’re not encountering any hitches, either you’ve failed to lead your organization toward its most promising and therefore challenging opportunities, or you’re simply missing all the clues that setbacks are brewing.

Signs You’re Succeeding In Life Even If You Don’t Feel You Are!

1. Your relationships are less dramatic than they used to be.

Drama is not maturity. As we age, we should develop maturity. So maybe your relationships were drama-filled in your past, but if you have moved beyond that, then you are successful.

2. You are not afraid to ask for help and support any more.

Asking for help does not equal weakness. In fact, it is a strength. No person has ever succeeded in isolation. It takes teamwork to accomplish goals. Asking or help is a sign that you have grown as a person.

3. You have raised your standards.

You don’t tolerate bad behavior any more – from other people, or even yourself. You hold people accountable for their actions. You don’t spend time with the “energy vampires” in your life anymore.

Six Signs Your Boss Is a Coward

1. He has others fire his direct reports

This probably is the most cowardly act of the cowardly boss. I’ve seen this first hand, and probably so have you. If your boss does this, he likes having the authority of his position, but not the responsibility.

And, he does not deserve you.

2. She will make a decision in private, then fail to protect her people in public if it does not work.

This is the classic behavior of someone who lacks confidence and is afraid of making mistakes.

And, she is someone you cannot trust.

3. He tells each person in private what the person “wants to hear,” which means he’s delivering different messages to each.

This is referred to as “divide and conquer.” Rather than having a consistent message and leading by example, he tries to control everyone around him.

And, he is a truly terrible leader.

4. She will not have face-to-face meetings to resolve conflicts.

"The Gap Between Knowlegde and Action"

Have you ever wondered why, a lot of times, you just can’t seem to make progress in life despite the fact that you know so much about what it takes to succeed? There just seems to be a gap between what you know and what you actually do. I call this The Gap Between Knowledge and Action. That is the title of this message: The Gap Between Knowledge and Action.

Over the years, I have gotten many enquiries through my website called Motivation for Dreamers from people who feel frustrated and unable to progress in life. Quite a few indicated that they have read a lot of different personal development and motivational materials over the years and acquired a wealth of knowledge in this way. But, for some reason, they just couldn’t get past reading or listening to such materials to actually living the life they desired.

Often this was accompanied by a sense of frustration and the feeling that perhaps such things just don’t work, or at least not for them. That is usually how we get to feel when there is a gap between our knowledge and our actions. It’s when you know what to do and how to do it, but you just can’t get to actually doing it.

I have attended or listened to many seminars myself over the years. In many cases they were great seminars, giving really useful information. But I noticed that in all likelihood, most people attending the seminar would put the seminar materials on their shelves afterwards and pretty much not act on the information, even though at the time they received it they were very enthusiastic and excited about it. But somehow, as the days go by the routines of daily life get in the way and the initial zeal just dies out.

It was a coaching session that I came to realize what exactly that gap was. I found out that the missing ingredient is usually:

How To Be Inspired To Do Your Very Best

People often ask the classic question: "What keeps you up at night?" Though the question itself is a little corny, the notion behind it is interesting and points to a dark set of issues. It's pessimistic. It presumes our work (or personal issues) are so all consuming that they override our ability to sleep.

The connotation is we're dealing with such weighty issues that they torment us in our dreams and become our nightmares. The fear of failure and disaster wakes us from our deep slumber with clammy hands and sweaty brows as we gasp for air.

Personal Leadership

That's a crappy way to live.
But we live that way all the time, and hyperfocusing on that type of question sets a tone for how we think about and approach our work and personal lives. That approach isn't sustainable. It's unhealthy (and trust me, after my heart attack last year, I pay a lot more attention to the unhealthy impacts of stress on my physical well-being). You have to ask yourself: Do you really want to go through life focusing on things that scare you and keep you up at night? I certainly don't.
I used to. I've now, however, seen the light. We need to ask ourselves a fundamentally different question. A question that is diametrically opposed to understanding the concerns that haunt the small hours. And if you ask yourself this question, I'm betting your entire outlook will change.
The question we should be asking is quite simple.

Things You Need to Stop Wasting Time

 

Today I received a thank you email from my blog reader named Hope.  She said my blog helped motivate her through an arduous recovery process last year.  Although her entire story was both heartbreaking and inspiring, this one line made me pause and think:
It’s hard to think about a story like Hope’s and not ask yourself:  “What do I need to stop wasting time on?”
Here are some things to consider, that I’ve been examining in my own life:

1. Distractions that keep you from special moments with special people. – Pay attention to the little things, because when you really miss someone you miss the little things the most, like just laughing together.  Go for long walks.  Indulge in great conversations.  Count your mutual blessings.  Let go for a little while and just BE together.
2. Compulsive busyness. – Schedule time every day to not be busy.  Have dedicated downtime – clear points in the day to reflect, rest, and recharge.  Don’t fool yourself; you’re not so busy that you can’t afford a few minutes of sanity.
3. Negative thinking about your current situation. – Life is like a mirror; we get the best results when we smile.  So talk about your blessings more than you talk about your problems.  Just because you’re struggling doesn’t mean you’re failing.  Every great success requires some type of worthy struggle to get there.

Surround Yourself With People Who Challenge Your Thinking

Are you feeling uninspired and stuck? Perhaps it's the people around you. Here are five ways to get people to challenge and inspire you to success.

 

It's nice to have people around who support you and are of like mind. Agreeable people boost your confidence and allow a certain level of relaxation. Most of us develop a stable of people with whom we like to work. We know their styles, and they know ours. It's comfortable and expedient. It is easy to find a rhythm, and it works. Unfortunately, that level of comfort can stall the very learning and innovation that can expand your company and your career.

It's nice to have people agree, but you need healthy conflict and differing perspectives to dig out the truth from a group-think and ideation. If everyone in the group has a similar point of view, your work will suffer from confirmation bias, rarely breaking boundaries and creating often unnecessary failure.

Reasons You Should Set Big Goals

It’s the end of the year, and the beginning of a new one. So it’s very common for people to turn their attention to setting new goals, and plans to improve their life this time of year. Personally, I advocate the “continual goal setting” method, so that whenever an old goal is completed, we have already started a series of new ones. However, if you are using the start of the new year as a measuring point to kickstart your life or business and make life more fulfilling, that is fantastic, and you’ve come to the right place.In this article it’s my intention to make the case for “setting big goals”, and giving five specific reasons why setting big goals is worthwhile.

Most of us are familiar with the S.M.A.R.T. method of goal setting. S.M.A.R.T. is an acronym used to remind us that goals should be specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time bound. This method of goal setting is fantastic. I have used it many, many times to produce visible results in my life and business. I’m not suggesting that we should stop setting S.M.A.R.T. goals, I’m just going to make the case that life is really fun when, in addition to our S.M.A.R.T. goals we also throw in some “massive, huge, audacious, incredible” goals to go along with it.

Big goals are scary to many of us. They cut right to the “A” in the S.M.A.R.T. scheme, that is, we may think that we can’t attain them. We look at a big goal, and then we look back at ourselves, and where we are right now, and we think “what is the point of setting a goal like that, I can never attain it.”  The reality is that in many cases we don’t know what we are actually capable of achieving until we try.  We don’t know our limits until we actually test them.
As a result, massive, crazy, wild goals can make our life more enjoyable and fulfilling. Here is why:

Rising above the clouds

Circumstances changes people -- for the Better. Growths are developing basic qualities like intelligence personality and expand skill, effort, strategies and persistence — it makes them more challenging. They teach how to love hard things, persist, and master them at any given point. They don't need to be puffed. It's a life in which you fulfill your potential, you will automatically experience moment of blessed silence in your head and it's not just being happy all the time, a life of growth that is if you want to create real positive change in your life

There is perhaps no area of your life where self-discipline is more important than in the way you manage your time. Time management is a core discipline that largely determines the quality of your life. By exerting your self-discipline with regard to time, you can choose what to do first, what to do second, and what to do not at all. And you are always free to choose.
You require tremendous self-discipline to overcome the procrastination that holds most people back from success
you always need to pay attention to and spend time on what you most value, whether it is your family your health, your social or sports activities or your money and career. It is only by looking at how you spend your time that you, and everyone else, knows what is really important to you.

Just keep in mind that few things matters and looks for absolute development and adjustment in the conscious because being and having start a step away from them, and we are now referencing to 3 points that can help development and our steps to achievement